Google is good, but...

like my blog, it is just MY experiences. Lately, I have been consumed with blogging about my hip, and what I am going through, which I am doing to help others who are going through it. When I started going through this back in February, I am sure that it was accompanied by a google search of hip flexor or something since that's what I thought was wrong. Then when I was limping, I googled limp+running+hip flexor. The searches continued and got more frequent the more I went along with the process. There is so much information out there, but at the same time, not that much. That was when I decided to start blogging more about my hip than the other parts of my life.

My dad is in the process of sailing from Hawaii to San Fransisco, a dream that he has had for most his life. Amazingly enough, he has email communication, so we have been writing back and forth. He has been gone since a bit before my surgery, so he hasn't been able to read my blog to keep up...so he asks questions and then I remember things I need to tell him, about the surgery and my recovery, and my life. I wanted to share some correspondence between the two of us:

Me-"Doctor is worried because he says there is a place when he went in where my cartilage is not attached to the bone. He fixed it as good as he knows how. Time will tell."

My Dad-"Cartilage is not attached to the bone... Hummmmm. Did he say that it will attach itself or grow together or you just wait and see what happens as it all heals? I'm sure you have googled this and found out as much as you want to know. He sounds like a great doctor and I, like you, totally trust him."

Me-"About my cartilage not being attached, the doctor aggravated it in surgery, to make it bleed and cause scar tissue, in hopes that the scar tissue will reattach it to the bone. Since I have a phenomenal doctor, I don't find myself googling my injury anymore. I can talk to him or call him, and he is super good. He talks to me for 30 minutes at a time if I need. Plus, I know so much now, and have finally gotten to the stage where whatever God's plan for me is, it is okay. I don't need to know what will happen in 4 months, or 6 months. He found the perfect doctor for me, when I didn't trust Him so now I decided there is no sense in wasting time with that."

I wanted to share this because there was a time that I wanted to control everything about this injury. I was obsessed with WHEN my surgery was going to be and with WHO my doctor was going to be. Ultimately, God was in control and His timing and choice was so much better than what I could have made for myself. I have summer to rest and recover post-op and a doctor that understands his needy patient. I haven't googled post-op about anything related to this. I have a few people that help me understand so-called "normal" through this, and I read their blogs regularly, but other than that, I am finally taking it one day at a time and I finally, once again, have been reminded that God has a great plan for me, even when I try to take charge.